Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Surprised by Loss


"...And here am I , budding among the ruins with only sorrow to bite on , as if weeping were a seed and I  the earth's  only furrow . " 

~Pablo Neruda , "Lifeless Suburb "


Life on planet earth can be hard at times . Very , very hard . And if we live long enough we will experience some form of loss . It may be a job loss . Or perhaps the loss of a marriage through divorce . And then there is the worst form of loss that comes through death . Death of a loved beloved pet or family member or friend .And it may be the hardest of all the losses we may endure for it is so final . So permanent . Set in stone so to speak . It is a great equalizer for it comes to us all no matter our"lot"in life . 

We may be rich or we may be poor . Young or old . Tall or short . Death is a part of living . Of life .And when it comes , our natural , God given response is to weep . Or we become numb . Or we simply go through the motions of living all the while feeling like we're dying inside . And depending on how close we were to the deceased , whether pet or person , our depths of feelings of loss will vary from person to person. We will all handle it differently . There is no proper way to grieve for it is as individual as the person or people dealing with the loss .

I share these things from experience for in the last year and a half my husband Steven and I have had several losses in our family . Our cat and his Mom , brother , sister and son and my longtime friend and former roommate have all gone to be with their Savior and creator . And the loss has been palpable . Tangible . As if it were a "thing" we could reach out and grab hold of . But we cannot . For they are gone and we are still here . And we feel the loss so deeply for that is how God made us . He made us human and humans feel things very deeply at times .

And we wonder if we'll ever feel normal again . And we get angry when we have to adjust to this new normal . This normal that is so  full of holes that once were full of the life and love of our now gone loved ones . And if the losses were catastrophic we may even wonder if we're next in line . I know my husband and I dealt with those types of feelings from time to time . It's as if that grim reaper was just counting down the moments until it was our time to depart . 

And yet , in the midst of all this loss something quite surprising has made it's presence known . And it's presence has changed everything . It's name is joy . And when it arrived it was a surprise for it was completely unexpected . But it came , with it's hope and optimism that shouted"This too shall pass. " And it showered us with a desire to live fully while still alive . To passionately and fully cast ourselves and our broken hearts upon our Savior and determine to live for Him fully and completely . And to pursue with our whole hearts that desire which He Himself has placed within us . we have stared death in the face and it's surprising result is to want to live , fully alive , so that God is glorified and we fulfill our destiny that was created by God long before we were ever born .

Blessings ~Sharon

3 comments:

John P. Weiss said...

Joy can be an unexpected gift. And the ones we loved and lost would want us to feel joy. To continue living and loving and embracing all that life, even with its immense sadnesses, can bring. I wish you and your husband continued healing and joy as you navigate this difficult road of loss.

Sharon Goemaere said...

John ,
Thank you for stopping by and leaving a comment . This writer appreciates it immensely . It beats the sound of crickets . :) This joy has been an unexpected gift for sure . And as you said , it's what our loved ones would want from us . And thank you so much for your kind wishes . It is much appreciated . ~ Sharon

John Weiss said...

You're welcome, Sharon. Don't let the crickets stop you from writing. The practice of writing is quite valuable. Consider an email sign up on your blog. That way, readers will be alerted to your new posts. I've found that people infrequently check back on my blog, but when they receive my email updates, then they visit and comment. Also, try to make your commenting settings as easy as possible for readers. Presently, your readers have to sign in, click that they're not a robot, then select boxes containing street signs before submitting their comments. This system helps prevent spam, but people on the Internet are impatient and unlikely to go through the whole process. You should be able to simplify your settings. Best of luck to you and happy writing!