Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Grief and Loss

Last night was a rough night for both my husband and I.Sleep just eluded us both for awhile.It may have been the heat.Most apartments in Oregon have no AC as we generally have mild weather in our area year round.We have to be content with fans which sometimes offer small comfort.It was also a rough night with my atrial fibrillation.As we lay there trying to drift off my mind wandered here and there in between prayers to the Father for sleep to descend upon us both.I thought of losses and how we grieve losses in one way or another.I have faced some losses in my lifetime as all of you have.I never knew my earthly father.Loss.My mom went to be with Jesus in 2001.Grief and loss.I still miss her.After marrying in 1992 at almost 31 I faced years of infertility.Loss of a dream however small.In 2004 I faced major surgery for endometrial cancer that forever sealed my fate as a woman who would never have children of her own.More loss.Currently I have to be careful just how much and how heavily I exercise as I must not get my heart rate too high until after I am cardioverted for this atrial fibrillation.I see this as a temporary loss of freedom to exercise as hard as I want to.There have been other losses too in our lives such as jobs and my husband's first marriage.Now please don't think I lay in bed nightly and think such sad things beacause I don't.That would cause insomnia for sure.I thought of all we have faced as a couple and I just had to praise and thank God for we are still alive.We are still here.We still find things to laugh about.We can still find joy in a sunrise or a flower or the smell of a summer morning.Our grief and loss has not and will not consume us because God is still in control and HE still loves us and we HIM in spite of what HE has allowed in our lives.I know there is an end to all this.And we can say with Jeremiah"Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope.Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed,for HIS compassions never fail.They are new every morning;great is your faithfulness."(Lamentations 3:21-23)No matter what you are facing right now remember this...God does love you and as long as you are still living and breathing there is always room for hope in your heart because God can be trusted to carry you through!God bless all.


cybeRanger said...

Amen! His love endures forever...

Sharon said...

Hi CyberRanger!
Thanks for stopping by brother.Amen indeed for HIS love does endure forever!!!Gods bless.

Macromoments said...

Sharon, God is faithful--that I know. Thanks for sharing your heart.

Sharon said...

Thanks for stopping by and posting here. :-)I don't know what else to share but my heart so there it is.My heart and God's faithfulness.The Lord bless you Bonnie and once again thanks so much for stopping by.

BHGA said...

Hi Sharon,

I am in awe of what you write as you pen so earnestly from the heart...and your faith shines through...may He continue to bless you as you write for our Father.

A sister in Christ

Meggie said...

That is a wonderful inspirational posting on carrying on in faith despite grief and loss. In 2001 I lost my brother in very sad harsh circumstances that still break my heart. I collapsed at the hospital when they told me he was gone. Then my Mother was abused and mistreated in a nursing home that resulted in her death in 2004. I have been so depressed by all the sad memories I have become almost dysfunctional. I tell myself it is wrong. The doctor even prescribed medication, but nothing seems to help. I have much to live for but have lost all interest. Those years of caring for my Mom and my brother seem so overwhelming that nothing else matters. Meg